Harry Evans, Boy Wonder
by razorbladesandbutterflyswings
Summary: What if James had been the cad Severus made him out to be? What if Neville Longbottom had been the 'Boy Who Lived? All this and more in the twisted universe of my new tale. Warning: May include some swashbuckling or reference thereto.
1. Introducing Harry

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this, I just thought I'd have a little fun with the Harry Potter universe. JK owns this...she's the empress of all things Potter while I am merely a lowly serf. Hopefully this covers my tuukus pretty good.

A/N: This is very, very AU. James is a living cad, Lily is a living sweethart, Severus is a good man, and Neville Longbottom is the 'Boy Who Lived'

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A young boy with messy black hair, glasses and one skinned knee was lying on his back, looking up at the sky. His bright green eyes took in the puffy clouds in the blue English sky. The boy's name was Harry Evans and today was his eleventh birthday. For most people, eleven would be a normal birthday without anything special about it. Harry, however, was not most people. Harry Evans was a wizard.

An owl swooping over Harry's head drew his attention away from the clouds. An owl flying in the daytime is quite startling if one wasn't used to it, but fortunately for Harry owl post was the most common form of Wizard to Wizard communication. A large grin spread across his face as Harry leapt up and raced into the house. He found his mother in the kitchen, smiling proudly with her hair unkempt and a streak of flour on her cheek. She gestured to the owl perched on the table and ruffled Harry's already messy hair, then returned to the cake she'd been making.

Harry sat down and removed the letter from the owl's talons. Petting the bird absently, he studied the letter. The emerald green ink shimmered on the yellowish parchment of the envelope. It was addressed clearly, so that there could be no mistake as to who it was for should it fall into the hands of some perplexed postman and it read:

'Mr H Evans

The Cosy Kitchen

17 Everdale Road

Little Whinging

Surrey'

Flipping it over quickly, hardly breathing for all the excitement Harry took in the seal. The seal was a large 'H' surrounded by four animals; a lion, a badger, a raven and a serpent, pressed into dark green wax. He ripped it open with trembling fingers and withdrew the letter. Harry read furiously:

_HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY_

_Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore_

_(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)_

_Dear Mr Evans,_

_We are pleased to inform you that you have a place at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment._

_Term begins on 1 September. We await your owl no later than 31 July._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Minerva McGonagall_

_Deputy Headmistress_

Harry let out a joyous whoop. "Mum," he exclaimed, throwing his arms around his mother, "I'm going to Hogwarts!"

Lily Evans chuckled and pressed a kiss to her son's forehead. "Was there ever any doubt luv?"

Stepping back Harry smiled and shook his head. Letting out another joyous whoop Harry tore a piece of paper off the pad on the fridge and scribbled 'I accept' on it followed by his signature. He gave it to the owl, along with a bit of ham from the fridge, and watched it fly out the kitchen window to deliver his response.

Wrapping her arms around her son, Lily felt her eyes begin to tear. "Oh Harry, I'm so proud of you," she sighed. She hugged Harry tighter, and held him until he said, "Aww mum, you're getting flour all over me." Lily laughed and released Harry. "Now go on," she said, "it's a wonderful day outside and you have a birthday to enjoy. Just be back in time for tea, the guests will be arriving then."

Harry waved to his mother and sprinted out the back door into the afternoon sunshine.

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	2. Happy Birthday Harry luv

Disclaimer: Still don't own it, never will.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! Enjoy chapter 2.

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Teatime came much too soon for Harry, who had been very engaged in repeatedly scaling the tree in his backyard. He reluctantly returned to the house when his mother called and didn't fuss when he was told to wash his hands and face and put on a clean shirt. Harry changed into the Puddlemere United quidditch jersey that he'd gotton on his last birthday. Quidditch was Harry's favourite sport, and he hoped to play on his one of the school teams at Hogwarts. Harry tried to comb his hair, but as always, he was unsuccessful. He smiled at his reflection and raced down the stairs when he heard the doorbell ring.

Lily had already answered the door by the time Harry had finished his descent down the stairs. Harry couldn't really see who was at the door until his mother moved out of the way. Then Harry couldn't help but beam. The person standing there was his very favourite person in the whole world next to his mum. "Severus!" he shouted, launching himself into his godfather's arms. Harry smiled as his godfather's arms closed around him. Severus gave the best hugs, even though he was quite skinny and a little mean looking. Severus set him down on the floor and put on what Harry liked to call his sour face. "Mr. Evans," Severus said, "You will refer to me as Professor Snape from now on." Moments later, Severus' face broke into a wide grin and Harry knew he wasn't serious for now.

Lily put her hands on her hips. "Alright now boys, clear out of the doorway so that we can let everyone else in," she shooed.

Harry led his godfather into the living room, which he was delighted to find his mother had decorated in his two favourite colors, blue and green. There was a table for presents, and his mum had even enchanted all the furniture in the room to change from blue to green the words 'Happy Birthday Harry!' running across them in silver. Harry sat Severus on the couch closest to the birthday chair (a dark green chair with blue streamers and bubbles floating around it) and they talked all about Hogwarts. They were shortly joined by his mother's friend Mrs. Weasley and four of her children; Fred, George, Ron and Ginny and then by some other people his mother knew, like Narcissa Black and her son Draco, Zatara Zabini and her son Blaise, a woman named Tonks, his Aunt Petunia and his cousin Dudley and finally the Hogwarts Groundskeeper Hagrid, who was so large that Harry's mother and Professor Snape had to make the doorway much taller and wider for him to fit through.

The children played party games like pin the tail on the dragon, which was difficult because the dragons was bewitched to keep from being caught, and break the cauldron, which was like a muggle piñata but exploded into a shower of candy and magic sparks when it was broken open. Harry high-fived Draco when he broke the cauldron and gave Ron several pats on the back when he managed to ambush the dragon and pin its tail on.

Sooner than Harry would have liked it was time for supper, which being Harry's choice was hot dogs and crisps. Some of the other children were unsure of the food, being that they were wizards, but soon found themselves enjoying the hot dogs immensely and requesting that their parents make them some time. Lily had a good chuckle at the horrified look on Narcissa's face when Draco said that he wanted to have hot dogs at his next birthday. "Cissa," she said, "lighten up. Have a hot dog." Begrudgingly Narcissa tried a hot dog and found that she quite liked it.

When everyone was finished their supper, Harry began to smile wildly. The next part was his very favourite part of birthdays. His mother disappeared into the kitchen with Severus and someone dimmed the lights. Moments later they reappeared holding a huge chocolate cake between them with twelve glittering candles on it. Everyone began to sing 'Happy Birthday' and Harry felt magic in the air. It was a different kind of magic than the kind everyone in the room could do. It was the magic of birthdays, childhood and happy memories. Severus set the cake down in front of Harry and he grinned at his godfather. His mother ran her hand through his hair and said "Well my darling, make a wish."

Harry thought hard about what he wanted more than anything. Maybe he should wish for a new broom or maybe an owl for the new school year. Harry thought very hard, and finally decided. As he blew out his eleven birthday candles and the extra one for good luck, he thought "I wish that this year could be the best ever, and I wish that Mom wouldn't miss me too much." So it was really two wishes. Big deal.

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	3. The Hogwarts discussion

Disclaimer: How many times do I have to say it isn't mine before they believe me? cheeky wink

A/N: Chapter three is here folks. Tiny spoiler alert For those of you hoping this won't be Lily/Severus..I apologize for the hints of that. Also...my Lily looks like Julianne Moore in Evolution.

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Later, when all the gifts had been opened and everyone had left, Harry sat with his mother and Severus looking through the school list. Lily sighed happily. It was moments like this that she felt most content. She smiled brightly as Harry smiled up at her. "Did you hear that mum?" he asked.

"I'm sorry darling, I wasn't listening."

Harry scowled playfully at his mother. "Severus said he would take me to get all my potions things, so that I would have sturdy stuff. That way we wouldn't have to replace the cauldron and things every year. He said it would be a birthday gift."

Lily scowled lightly at Severus. "Harry," she said, "I think it's time you washed your face and got ready for bed."

"Aww mum, do I have to?"

"Yes dear. You've had a long day, and we have to be up early tomorrow. Have you forgotten that football camp starts tomorrow?"

Harry sighed, shaking his head and made his way up the stairs to get ready for bed.

The moment he was out of sight, Lily stood, putting her hands on her hips and levelling Severus with a full out glare. Severus, for his part, tried to look as unaffected as possible which was rather difficult as he was certain that Lily was able to wilt plants with her glare. "Honestly Severus, another present? You already bought him a broom, and that full set of Puddlemere quidditch robes. You're going to set expectations I can't possibly meet."

Severus winced at her tone. Angry, screaming, murderous Lily he could deal with, but icy, disdainful, disappointed Lily was another thing entirely. Severus stood and took Lily's hands in his. "That isn't what I intend to do at all. I love that boy like a son; I just want him to have the very best. It isn't like I don't have money to spare."

Lily sighed "I know that Sev, but I don't."

"Have you given any more thought to Albus's offer?"

Lily sat back down on the couch, giving Severus a moment to sit beside her before continuing. "I'd love to teach Charms Severus, you know that. Lord knows it would probably pay better than secretarial work, but I don't want to crowd Harry. I think it would be uncomfortable for him to go to school and have to see me every day. Children would treat him unfairly if I was there. They would try to use him to sway me into giving good grades, and they'd accuse him of favouritism. I couldn't do that to him."

"I think it would be better for you to be there for him. If you don't want to teach Charms, take the assistant position with Trelawny. Harry won't have that class for three years."

"I don't think that's a good idea Sev."

"Potter is teaching flying with Hooch."

Severus watched Lily's face turn a curious shade of purple before she roared "I am not leaving my son in the hands of that monster! I'll take the position with Sybil."

"I though you might. I'll tell Dumbledore as soon as I get back to Hogwarts."

Severus wrapped his arms around Lily, pulling her into a tight hug. He felt her relax and smiled. He was glad she had decided to come to Hogwarts, but he feared that she might fall for Potter all over again and he would lose any chance he had of making a real family with her and Harry. Stepping back, he smiled sadly at her. "I'll be by on Thursday afternoon to take Harry to Diagon Alley. He hasn't got football camp that day does he?"

Lily shook her head. "I don't work that day, so perhaps I'll come with you and we can get all of his shopping done in one day. I'll owl Sybil and see if there's anything I need to get for class, and find out what kind of things she's got planned for the students."

Severus nodded and walked to the hall closet. He withdrew his coat and put it on. Lily opened the door for him and he stepped out. A few steps down the walk, he turned to her and said "For what it's worth, I'll be glad to have you there." Then he apparated away with a pop.

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